This coming Monday, August 14th, Shane and I will celebrate 12 years together as husband and wife.
We had no idea what we were getting into.
He sure didn't– I was a baby Christian. (Only about 3 years old then.)
But thankfully, he saw my heart and my potential. Thankfully, he STILL sees my potential because I fail so often at being the wife and mother I so desire to be.
My family legacy isn't too strong. Shane knew I came from a broken home. Both parents married 3 times each, including the one to each other, and now single again– probably until they die. I never met my grandfather on my Mother's side. In fact, she'd be upset if she knew I called him Grandpa. He was an alcoholic and she is continues to be bitter about it. Grandma seperated from him years before I was conceived. My Mother's brother is a proclaimed athiest– trusting in his $$$$$$ and not in the One who blessed him with it. He is a very hateful, mean, old man– but he has his money.
My Dad's father died when he was 9 years old. His Mother never remarried and they all worshipped the ground she walked on, but my Dad never learned how to be a husband. But he did try to be a Dad.
They divorced when I was 12. Back then “no one” was divorced. Don't let anyone ever tell you that divorce doesn't affect the children. It does– it scarred me and still affects my marriage, my parenting, the way I relate to others, etc.
What little church we attended (mainly my brother and I were “sent”) when we were little went out the window when the divorce came.
My Mom went to work after the divorce. And she worked hard to provide what child support didn't. We spent every other weekend with Dad and every other holiday. But it was never the same.
I always wanted to be a wife and mother. I looked for love in all the wrong places. But God knew the desires of my heart. And God in His sovereignty saved me for Shane. You see I had to wait for him to grow up because he was 20 when we married and I was 29.
This is a backward tribute– but it is a tribute to my wonderful, solid, even-keeled, fabulous, intelligent husband of 12 years.
No, he's not a saint, but he has put up with my hormones, my all or nothing personality, and my deep, dark, sins.
12 years ago, some friends of ours sung “I Will Be Here” at our wedding. I'm sure someone sang this song at many of your wedding ceremonies. I have been wanting to put some music on my blog and have searched, hoping to find a nice relaxing hymn and decided (at least for now) that this song was the closest I would find for now. I cry when I hear it, because Shane has been “here”. He has shown the love of the Father to me in our marriage, even when I have been unlovable. He has shown patience when he could have been frustrated. He has been there through good times and bad. It is in Shane's honor and in honor of our 12th anniversay that I add “I Will Be Here” to my blog for your listening enjoyment.
(Yes, I admit it's cheesy, but just appease me)