It seems that nothing is settled in our life and we are at odds with many around us.
I have not spoken to my mother since we returned from E. TN in January. (remember the pit bull incident?) Other family members call and talk "at" us and when another phone is ringing must go take that call… it’s very frustrating. We cannot talk to them because they are always right and we are always wrong. So we stuff it. Relationships with many family members are not what they once were, but they are as good as they’ll get. And we’re realizing it’s not necessarily because they’ve changed, it’s because we have gotten weirder. Shane works for Christian radio and feels alone in his convictions. He was asked Friday if we wanted a McCain/Palin yard sign–thankfully we live in the country so it wouldn’t do much good even if we were supporting McCain, so Shane didn’t have to say anything. Shane hasn’t told anyone at work that we aren’t voting for McCain… but some have made speculations, while Shane is nearby… (we’re voting for Baldwin). We are the only homeschooling family where he works… Others there feel like their children should be salt and light in the government school. Or "need" 2 incomes to support their families. There are a couple of people that he works with that are difficult to say the least and when he takes it to upper management, they tell him to "be the bigger man" How long can he "be the bigger man" and continue doing his job to the best of his ability with the kind of things going on that are? Things with Little Bit are so much better, but it seems that I cannot get past some of the residual affects of 4 years with yelling fits and so much more… my hormones are significantly improved since I found my new doctor that told me I needed to ditch the bio-identical hormones. I also started taking "Vitamin Code" vitamins last week. So things are improving… but I want it over NOW!
We are looking for a new church home again. But thankfully God has given me such a peace that I am content to look for a long time, and to not place membership immediately when that time comes… if it ever comes.
Then there are the little things, would you believe the crazy lady with the angry husband CALLED our home yesterday morning before 8 AM and wanted us to buy the Suburban they didn’t want to sell us a month ago! Probably for more money than we bought it for the first time, since they had it relisted on Ebay due to end yesterday evening. I got a call from a company that scams people for past due debts (yes, I googled and they are scammers and have been reported numerous times) … they tried to tell me I owed money for a debt from 20 years ago… very frustrating since that chapter of my life has been closed for nearly 20 years and the statute of limitations is WAY past. The neighbor apparently still hates us because of our dog and I don’t know what would happen if we really needed something out here as none of the neighbors, save one, are remotely friendly. Shane’s "best friend" and him haven’t been "best" friends for some time… since we left "the church" really… the Parents as Teacher’s thing was just the icing on the cake…
We tried a different church yesterday, one in the same town where we live. The Pastor was wonderful, not just the sermon, but the Pastor himself. And the service itself was nice too. Although the worship leader could use a little help– but he was a younger man, and that always excites us to see a church using the young people in service. The Pastor does a "table talk" instead of Sunday school for the adults. He was SO good with the children and Bubba especially enjoyed the TT greatly. The Pastor is a prof at one of the seminaries in the city, and has been on the mission field which I think makes a great difference. The people were very friendly, although there were several government teachers, or retired administrators. Yikes! They finally figured out that we weren’t sending our children to their AWANA classes. After one man explained that "there was a school teacher and former adminstrator teaching the classes that could handle anything that might come up" I guess he thought we were afraid that our "foster" children wouldn’t behave–HAHAHA!!!! Of course, it didn’t take long for them to realize that they were our children and they do behave. The Pastor seemed to understand what we were doing and even seemed to enjoy having our children in his class. We were encouraged yesterday which, for now, is the goal for us in a church. Of I must also say that it did make us long for Shane to be in ministry again… we do not understand, he has felt called to preach since he was a young child. But are trying to wait patiently on Him.
We’ll probably go back, but it’ll be totally up to Shane.
My battery is almost dead, so I better go plug in and recharge. Please pray for us… We know God is God and He is in control, but when everything is piling up it can tend to wear on ya, even in the best of circumstances.