We have boys. We have 2 boys. We have 2 boys with raging hormones. That ought to be enough information for you to figure out where SOME of this post is going. But there was a lesson to be learned by Momma.
One day last week we had some struggles.
We had a couple of frustrated boys. They were accusing each other of stuff all over the place. One accusing the other of bitterness from many years ago. The other was denying, but coming with his own set of accusations. Eye rolls and frustrations were all over the place. Including my “squinchy, creepy face” which is apparently what Isaac calls it when I get the “mom” look because he actually said it out loud the other day and it sent Shane and I into a great laughing fit. You know the one. If you’re a mom, you have it too. It’s inbreed in girls and exhibits itself at “those” moments.
But that’s a bonus…here’s where I intended this post to go.
When the dust settled from rolling eyes, growls, and “squinchy, creepy faces” here’s where we ended up.
One boy says “I’ve told him to stop over and over again! And he WON’T!!!” This is not an uncommon problem our house. In fact, I would say it’s among the top problems we deal with.
I often hear one child telling another repeatedly to move, or stop, or __________.
Then this:”I told him/her ____times to stop! And he/she didn’t!!!”
This happens even though Shane and I both have told all of them, “you ask them, NICELY, once, then you come to us and we’ll deal with it. You may not like how we deal with it, but you need to trust us to take care of it the way we think is best”
Hmmm….looks like we’ve got children trying to be parents.
I bet that never happens in your house? HAHAHA!
After the exchange that day, I explained to them that when they are being the parent, it moves Shane and I out of the place of parent and to the place of referee. And then we can’t do the job that God is given us to do.
Enlightenment filled their faces…and mine too…
Because, there ‘s a life lesson for us grown-ups in this exchange too.
Sometimes we do that.
Sometimes we have problems that we try to handle on our own when we should be running to Jesus with them. When we’re having problems and try to solve them ourselves we’re taking God out of his rightful place as our loving Father.
When we don’t seek God for decisions; for every day guidance, we are telling Him we don’t trust Him for the outcome. We want to do it OUR way! And then we complain when our way didn’t work.
We make him the referee and then we blame Him for the problems that we have.
Guilty as charged, more times than I care to count.
But that’s not God’s plan. He wants us to cast our burdens to Him, to let him take charge and be the parent. He does know what’s best for us doesn’t He?
And we can trust him to take care of us, can’t we?
And just like I told my boys, when they let me (or Shane) be the parent, they don’t have to worry about it anymore, they can trust that we can handle it.
I often tell my boys that I’m big enough to handle their problems. But sometimes I forget that God is big enough to handle mine.
But when they trust me, and I trust God, peace comes.
Isn’t that what we all want?