Relationships

Broken relationships.  But what is broken? Can it be broken, if it was never there?  I am reminded that I never truly had a relationship with the one that hurt me so…

I should have.

Siblings are “supposed” to have relationships.

But supposed to and reality are two different things.

Reality is 1 husband, 4 kids.  A FAMILY that I am very blessed to have.

The family that by all odds, I shouldn’t have.  But God is gracious.

Meals to plan.  Food to prepare.

Vacation memories from the past.  Climbing mountains.  Oceans. Standing where our countries forefathers wrote now famous words.  Seeing artifacts.  Visiting more museums in a week than anyone should be allowed.  Seeing the world beyond my own states borders.  Trying new foods and having new adventures.

And vacations in the future to plan.  Hawaii is within our grasp.

Bandaging a scraped knee; although as they grow it doesn’t happen as often now that they’re older.

Being responsible is reality.

Living life is reality.

The pain is deep.  It is real.  But I can’t change others.

I can choose how to respond.

Truth be told; the other day, I did not respond well.

I was angry, and hurt and I lashed out 25+ years of ugly on one who didn’t care.

And history shows me that nothing I could do would make amends.

So I chose to know that God has forgiven me and leave the rest in His more than capable care.

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